I’ve had a thought for quite some time now that I would probably cope quite well if I was a nun. I don’t seem to have the same issues with silence that other people do; in fact, given a choice between a noisy party and a quiet home, I’ll take the quiet home kthnx. Why? I don’t like being in noisy places. I can’t think clearly and it makes me withdraw somewhat.

My favourite time of the day is about 10pm – 2am at night. After the madness of prime time and before the infomercials. I know, TV rules my life, yes? We’ve established this before, I believe. It’s quiet. There’s a stillness about that time of night that I adore. Usually I’m the only one awake, and with that still silence, I can think, I can write, and I can do things I can’t normally do during the day. Most of the artwork I’ve done has been done late at night, with the TV on as background noise.

I’m not really a morning person. It takes me a while to wake up. I’m not the sort who can get up instantly, at least, not very often. Is it possible to be addicted to the night? Because I think that’s what I’ve become. The night is most conducive to my mind, so I tend to embrace it. I’m not as nocturnal as I used to be. I’ve had to compromise my need to be up early enough for work and my need to go to bed after midnight. That hasn’t stopped a few 3am bedtimes though.

Also, rage has become a staple of my Friday and Saturday night. The effect of this has been that a lot of music (and music videos) is just better at night. Some clips only make sense at 2am when you’re half-asleep. XD But I wouldn’t have it any other way. Even if my interest in triple j wanes (which it has, because I found a better radio station to listen to – sorry, Marieke), rage will always be there to start my weekend.

Perhaps it’s because I spent the first half of my life without the internet, I am somewhat wary of it taking over everything. There are times when I don’t want to be connected to everyone. I just want to shut it all down, and spend some time with myself, and my Gods, if I’m in the mood. There just isn’t enough time for people to do that these days. Everyone rushes about at a hundred miles an hour, and barely has time to think for themselves. We’ve lost the ability to just sit still and think, we’ve always got to have our mobile or laptop or mp3 player or whatever. But these things are not essential. I think we’d all be better off if we could find that silence again, and not be afraid of it, but to fall into its loving embrace, and find ourselves again.

I still remember her telling me once to go home, home meaning the UK. I’ve never forgotten that, and I suppose that’s when I had this dawning sense of being half-English. Okay, if I’m honest, a third Australian, a third British, and a third Welsh. Mum’s mother’s family are Welsh, and Granddad carried a Welsh flag when he used to march with the Normandy vets in the ANZAC Day marches.

I suppose part of my ignorance/apathy towards the British side of my ancestry was that I didn’t particularly see them as vastly different cultures, even though I know intellectually that they are. Okay, so I’ve always had a love of Britain and British things and the UK is somewhere I have wanted to visit for years. Still, I never really saw it as a second ‘home’ like I do now.

It was in this realisation that I figured out where I sat on the republican/monarchist side with regards to Australia, and the British side of me won. In spite of the fact that Australia is rather much like a republic anyway, cutting ties with Britain would, to me, feel really wrong. It’s not a rational, fact-based argument for me. It’s tied in with my identity, and my half-Englishness. Both Britain and Australia are my home.

It’s funny, I remember my mum telling me that my (paternal) gran didn’t like mum because she was too English, and she felt she was bringing up her grandkids to be British rather than Australian. I suppose I was doomed from the beginning. Even later, I felt gran wasn’t as keen on me as much as my brother because I was too like my mum.

You could argue that identification has stuck in my mind and I’ve grown into it over the years. I mean, shit, even I’ve noticed my vowels are becoming more British.

And yet… I have such an attachment to Australia and the places I’ve grown up here that it would be impossible for me to cut ties with Australia. I’m still wholeheartedly and proudly Australian. If you live on the same land long enough, you become part of it. No matter how much I might yearn for other pastures, I grew up on this land and I’ve lived most of my life here. I know the plants, the seasons, the animals, the way the year progresses. I have a connection to this land and cutting ties with that would feel the same as cutting ties with Britain. Both are important to me.

I think the internet has vastly changed the way humans perceive the notion of ‘community’ and ‘nationality’. Nations are not just bound by physical borders; Indeed, I’d argue that a nation is only as big as the people who belong to it, whether by self-identification or by acceptance by the wider community. The internet allows for people to belong to communities or ‘nations’ in a way they might not’ve been able to do before.

I think even more now than before there has become a need to label and identify yourself, to announce/declare to the world who, where and with what you identify. You, as a person, are judged based on your identification before anyone gets to know you. I realise this has always been the case, that people judge before they get to know someone, but my point is the internet makes it stupidly easy to merely list every group or affiliation or identity we hold, and reduce ourselves to a group of words on a profile. I think in doing this we are selling ourselves short, and turning complete people into tiny little bits of information. The different groups we identify with are not seen as smaller parts of the whole, they are seen as separate things, separate sides, and we have to juggle these differeing sides so that one group doesn’t find out about the others.

I’m doing it all the time, juggling my queer, pagan side with my other sides. Every time I join a new group, I’m constantly trying to judge how much and what information to tell them. Which side do I show to them? Which would they be most accepting of? Which groups am I willing for them to know about? Which ones will I hide? I think it causes more fractures than anything.

*sighs* I think I have run out of thoughts. But at least I got this out. I don’t think I can use this for the unit I was thinking of using these thoughts for, but I’ll have to find some sort of angle I can use that I’m interested enough to research. I am not convinced my tutor will be as open to my strange ideas as the tutor I had last semester who allowed me to interpret an essay question in such a way that it allowed me to discuss God, religion, alien/UFO cults and the Mongolian Empire. But we’ll see. I’ve got the week to find some angle that might interest me so I’ll leave it for now and head to bed.

(If I’m being technical, I am Gen X, since I’m the child of baby boomers. But I like my special awesome not part of either classification better. )

Anyway. I’m a rather nostalgic person. I’ve mentioned it before on here. I adore vinyl, old movies, VHS, cassettes, retro games, old consoles, all that awesome stuff I grew up with. At the same time, I’m very at ease with modern technology and the internet. I’ve been using the net since I was in my early teens, around a decade.

(Also, WWII-era code-breaking and computers and Enigma machines are all epic and winsome and Srsly, when I saw CSIRAC at the Melbourne Museum late last year, I was quite possibly the happiest little Alex alive. 8D!)

(AlsoAlso, I want to visit Bletchley Park. Like, really badly. Really, really badly. >.>)

I remember dial-up, DOS games, 14.4k modems, and dot matrix printers. I remember doing assignments and referring to actual physical encyclopaedia volumes in the library. Hell, we even had a set of ~20 year old encyclopaedias at home. They were awesome. XD

I’ve been writing websites since I was 14. That’s when I first learned HTML. I remember the first site I ever made. It had a red background and white text. It was awesome. XD

My parents have always dragged me off to op shops ever since I was a kid. They’re the sort of places where, if you’re nostalgic like me, you fall in love with old stuff. Old stuff with character. Every time I buy something from an op shop, I can’t help wondering who used to own it, why they donated it to the op shop, do they still miss it, those sort of things. I could create characters based on everything I’ve bought based on asking those questions.

(In fact, perhaps I should do that one day. Get a bunch of stuff I’ve bought and make characters based on who might’ve owned them.)

But I digress. I don’t know. I’ve got this love, fascination and adoration for analogue technology. We’ve got a record player at home, a VHS player, I think we even still have a cassette deck somewhere. Also, old stuff smell is intoxicatingly gorgeous. Like, it’s like old book smell, but more awesome. It’s old stuff smell. It’s orgasmic. XD

(Er, sorry for the brackets. My thoughts fail at being linear. XD)

At the same time, I rather like new technology and I’ve grown up with computers and CDs and other awesome things that I possibly couldn’t live without anymore. They’ve become a part of my life and world-view and as much as I adore the past, the internet and the kind of technology we have now is really quite awesome and it’s all good and I really should stop now before I ramble any more. XD

This is possibly not one of my better pieces, but whatever. It’s late, I’m tired and yeah. 8D

I think this is wrong. If anything, the internet only increases the incidents of running into morons. The anonymity the Internet offers makes morons even more intolerable because they have less inhibitions about what they say and many more places to say it without censure.

Also, the article seems to assume that finding groups of people that like the same things you like automatically eliminates idiots. It most certainly does not, and anyone with any Internet experience at all will be able to tell you this firsthand.

And, okay, to be fair, I should probably also stop calling them idiots. I should probably refer to them as people who give you the shits, idiots or otherwise. You are going to run into these people on the Internet. I guarantee it. Just because you share an interest doesn’t mean you’re actually going to like them. I know there are people online in communites I’m a part of who annoy the crap out of me. But that’s part of life. You have to deal with idiots and people who annoy you.

Actually, the trigger for this rant wasn’t the article, it was witnessing the horror of some published work in a rant about the poor state of the English language. That got me ranting about morons. XD

Classes start again tomorrow. The only thing I am dreading is having to deal with people with lower literacy levels than me. These are invariably school leavers, and it makes me cry for the standard of education we’re giving our kids. These kids are our future. What kind of future are we going to have when we have all this wealth and opportunity and they can’t read or write very well? What kind of future is that?

Call me old-fashioned, but I firmly believe in a decent education. You should be able to use the English language in a good manner, be able to express yourself well and not freak out when told to read something. Seriously, if you are at university and it takes you a whole day to read a 14 page short story, I dread to think how you are going to cope with the rest of your tertiary studies with such a reading ability. Especially if you’re a science student.

I really hate this lazy attitude to English, especially online. That it doesn’t matter because it’s the Internet, as if using proper English spelling and grammar is opional unless it’s for some sort of formal occasion. I think this is a dangerous thing to have because it teaches bad habits. It teaches poor communication skills. Is that really what we want to encourage in our children? Have we been reduced to seeing Gen Y as some sort of slave labour, there to work with a basic education and nothing more? I think we’re short-changing them and not tapping into their true potential, and society will be worse off because of it. They are the ones that will be teaching their children. Surely we should care about the knowledge they pass on and how they raise their kids. If we can’t get it right, what hope have they got?

1) It is impossible to listen to The Idle Race and be unhappy as a result.
I didn’t think it would be possible to like a band after only hearing one song, but, well, I’m shallow. And ‘Days Of The Broken Arrows’ is EPIC. Srsly.

It’s partly the music. It’s just so… freakishly awesome. And happy! Yay for psychedelic rock. XD But yes. Also, /random fangirl moment/ Jeff Lynne’s voice is sosososo prettiful! /sanity restored. …I might be slightly in love with his falsetto at the moment. >.>

Though I still adore them post-Jeff as well. Very prettiful music, considering it’s ~40 years old. <3 *watches music collection age a decade* XD ‘By The Sun’ is epic and prettyful and I luffs it so. <3
2) People are morons.
I know, I know, I knew this already, but seriously. People are too easily offended. And if you go looking to be offended and find yourself offended, then it’s no one’s fault but your own.

Seriously. When did we become so up ourselves as a nation? When did we lose the ability to laugh at ourselves?

*sighs*

I don’t know. I suppose I’ve reached the point at which any outrage about The Chaser is one too many. Then again, this is the same country who were obsessed with Utegate for over a week.

3) You can never stop playing Tetris.
No, really, you can’t. No matter how hard you try, once it’s sucked you in, you’ll never be free of it. I’m beginning to believe it’s unbeatable just to keep you playing for eternity. D:

…Did you guess I’ve been playing a lot of NES!Tetris lately? XD

I have been playing Tetris on various formats/consoles for *thinks* 14 years? I started on my brother’s old black and white GameBoy. I was away on holiday, playing it, and I almost beat it. Since then, I have wanted to beat it, just once, so I can put this addiction to rest. Alas, I have no conquered level nine yet. D:

One day, people! One day! D:!

4) Stephen McDonell is my new hero
*swoons*

The Eyebrow Man is ABC’s China Correspondent, and really quite kickarsedly awesome. I’ve always had a lot of respect for foreign correspondents, Sally Sara being a particular favourite. I don’t envy the job they do, even as it needs to be done.

But why is Stephen so awesome? Well, I do love that he speaks mandarin, and you really can tell he has a great respect for the culture in which he’s working, and a passion for his job. I might tease him for his errant eyebrows and his awesome wardrobe, but really, he’s completely awesome.

I remember seeing a doco series on foreign correspondents and how they cope with what they see and experience. Sally Sara was on that and oh, man, I may have kinda fell for her. >.> *seems to have a thing for ABC journos*

5) It helps to actually have five things to write in here before beginning.
I thought I had five, and then I kinda forgot the rest. Should I do this again (due to lack of other ideas), I’ll remember to plan it out before hand.

Perhaps I’ll do them every week anyway, in case I fail at thinking of some deep and meaningful topic to bitch about for 600 odd words.

And on that note, since I am tired and in need of sleep (when I finish listening to moar Idle Race), I might finish this semi-successful attempt at blog content. Huzzah! XD

I don’t know, when I look back at my life, so much of it has been shaped by the presence of music. As much as I like my quiet time, I think I would go spare without music.

At the moment, triple j are counting down their Hottest 100 Of All Time (which I dutifully voted in). And, you know what? Save from Jeff Buckley, Kings of Leon, and Coldplay, I actually don’t mind most of what’s been chosen. I’m rather enjoying it, actually. Probably would’ve voted for some of them, if I’d thought of them at the time.

(As an aside, sure, I’m not a Michael Jackson fan, but I will admit to being somewhat partial to Thriller and Bad, and Thriller got in, so awesome. )
I suppose part of it is because triple j and rage have been part of my life for nearly a decade, and the kind of music they play has morphed and inspired the sort of music I like. They’ve shaped my music taste in a way nothing else has. A lot of these songs I remember from rage guest programmers. Others I remember from my teen years.

A list like this is always going to be subjective, people will always disagree, because music taste is a very personal thing. I think what it reflects most is the triple j audience themselves. And sure, just cos I like a lot of old music, I don’t necessarily think age makes a song better or more brilliant than a younger one. Not all old rock was brilliant. There was plenty of shit then, just as there’s plenty of shit now, and I think this will always be the case while the music industry still mostly cares about making money than decent quality music.

And while it might be noble to say the whole illegal music downloading shit is Gen Y being radical and hardcore and sticking it to the man, I don’t think that’s even a thought Gen Y considers when ripping songs off youtube, downloading leaked albums and discographies and other things. I think, at the heart of it, for a generation weaned on the internet, that they merely like getting shit for free, like every other human being on the planet, and if any technology is capable of feeding their habit, it’s the internet.

I’m one of those people who’s not really Gen X or Y. My parents were babyboomers, barely, so technically I’m Gen X, but I also share a lot of characteristics with Gen Y, and I’ve grown up a digital native. I would also challenge the notion that all of Gen Y are computer/internet savvy. I don’t think this is a fair generalisation. Those who are interested in computers and the net enough will be computer literate digital natives. Merely being born in that generation doesn’t mean you’re an instant digital native; you have to actually interact with the technology, grow up with it and use it for that to happen.

But I digress. (An expedition to wiki informs me I’m part of the MTV generation. In spite of never watching MTV evar. XD Then again, depending on which definition you use, I’m either Gen X or Y, so… XD)

I had a thought earlier in the week. How many of the groups around now will still be performing and touring thirty years from now? Forty years from now? Do Gen Y have a different attitude to music? Is it not so much a career thing? Or is that more to do with the increased fickleness of the industry and actually making it? That it’s actually much harder to sustain success now than it used to be?

I suppose any list documenting notable bands worthy of eternal praise and devotion is going to be different for everyone. Because at the end of the day, music is a very personal thing, and what I love and adore and has shaped my life is not the same as someone else’s. Just because I don’t get how apparently brilliant Jeff Buckley was doesn’t mean I am somehow deficient in being able to pick good music. Then again, I adore trashy 80s music and obscure 70s rock, so who am I to complain?